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[T作文-求改] 来狠狠的批!现在的学生是否比以前的学生更对政治感兴趣

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619899442 发表于 2014-11-3 20:13:31 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式

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Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Students are more interested in politics now than they were in the past.

When it comes to the recent students’ attitude towards politics, some people think they are more concerned about it, others hold a different view that they have become less care about it. As far as I am concerned, student political activism has increased significantly in the past decades, and it is attributable to several factors, which will be stated as follows.

In the first place, modern technologies make students have easy access to all kinds of political policies and political news. For example, as a university student, our school allows us use the Internet for free, thus encourage us to gain the latest information including political news. Moreover, students in our school even have set up a lot of online forum that allow us to have a discussion and even a debate about the politics with each other. Therefore, with help of modern technologies, student turn out to be more concerned about the politics.

In the second place, the government is less serious about the politics issues compared with it thirty years ago. As a Chinese student, I was told by my grandfather that China had experienced a so-called Great Cultural Revolution period when politics is so sensitive that almost everyone that questioned the temporal leadership was put into prison. However, with the development of democracy in China, those thing sounds crazy in these days, and every present Chinese is allowed to give some positive or negative comments to the government. Therefore, compared with students in the past decades, current students have the right to make their own judgments on the politics, and undoubtedly they become more interested in it.

Admittedly, some students in these days are attracted with other online resources. For instance, a roommate of mine is addicted to the animation programs on the Internet. On the other hand, this could not happened in the past years because of the absence of the Internet. Thus my roommate could have been more concerned about the politics if he had been born decades of years ago. However, the total number of that kind of persons is far less than that of the persons who are interested in the political issues, because my roommate is the only person that I know who is attracted by other things. Therefore, present students are overall more concerned about the politics than students in the past.

In conclusion, with the consideration of those reasons stated above, I believe that the students today are more interested in politics.
嘉嘉笨猪猪 发表于 2014-11-4 00:57:36 | 显示全部楼层
个人觉得however这个词可以换一换,或者放在句中而不是句首;然后就是倒数第二段,说自己室友沉迷漫画那段证据有点牵强,既然反驳了自己前面的例子,要证回来你得有充分证据,建议加一条证据,比如:我和朋友们茶前饭后必然少不了政治的话题,网络数据显示关注参与政治话题评论的人数超过百分之多少是青少年。。。(编一下也OK)
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fengfeifei 发表于 2014-11-4 19:15:00 | 显示全部楼层
嘉嘉笨猪猪 发表于 2014-11-4 00:57
个人觉得however这个词可以换一换,或者放在句中而不是句首;然后就是倒数第二段,说自己室友沉迷漫画那段 ...

。。。突然觉得我俩头像怎么很像……
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