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本帖最后由 欢迎大家润欧洲 于 2022-8-19 18:10 编辑
先上两道菜尝尝。
Dear Team,
John Smith, Chief X Officer, has decided to leave company A to pursue an outside opportunity, effective xx.xx.xxxx.. .и
John has joined the company in year 19xx. John has played an important role in business A, driving improvement in business B.
We are actively recruitng for John's successor. During this time, his team will report to manager C..--
I would like to thank John for his contribution to the business and wish him success in his future endeavors.
VS
Dear Team, ..
It is with mixed emotions that I announce Jane Smith will leave the company to pursue new opportunities, effective xx.xx.xxxx.
Jane has made a significant contribution to the business during her x years as Chief X Officer. In particular, Jane has delivered (a concrete result mentioned here). I would like to thank her for all of her contributions. I wish Jane all the best in her next chapter.
With this change, the responsibilities for her team will be absorbed by manager C's organization.
. ----
现在来看翻译。
第一道菜的意思是:John这个蠢货,上任以后没有什么成绩,我本来就想炒了他,但是他运气好先找到下家接盘了(an opportunity单数)。. 1point 3acres
John has played an important role... driving improvement...
作为高管,如果上司给你的评价是important, improvement,只能说明啥也没有deliver。
第二道菜的意思是:Jane干活还是不错的,有成绩,但是我无奈要送她走了(可能是Jane自己找了更好的新工作,但这个里面是公司风向变了要eliminate一个位置,Jane虽然有成绩但不是老板跟前的红人,要砍人只能先砍她了,主要从“to pursue new opportunities"复数格式看出来,以及没有说we are actively recruiting for Jane's replacement而是把团队给别人了)。
It is with mixed emotions that I announce. .и
凡是上司写了这句话的,都是告诉其他人“不是我要炒这人的”。
Jane has made a significant contribution...In particular, Jane has delivered (a concrete result mentioned here)
用上significant表示成绩可以,提到concrete result更是好。
类似的表示成绩可以的词有:strong, many contributions...
哪些词是非常正面的肯定呢?
instrumental. 1point 3 acres
fundamental
unique
critical
state-of-the-art
stellar
incredible
-baidu 1point3acres
语序有时候也会表现出情绪的区别,例如先说感谢此人,跟先说我们在找新人,是有差别的。前者是老板先想到感谢一个人,后者是老板先忙着找个更好的人。不过语序没有用词重要,有时候就是模板的区别。
另外,高管正常退休的announcement有时候会写得巨长,比该高管家属将来能写出来的讣告都长,以示正面情绪“不是我逼他退休的”。 |