fall2017 ee signal processing & Machine learning 方向sop 求意见~

题主打算申请fall2017 DSP和机器学习方向的MS。。。因为字数限制，这篇已经被裁掉200字了。。。求地里大牛们在语法，结构，和用词用句上再精简/提炼些么。。

有点像CV的扩充版，而且都在讲故事。个人意见，每段尽量表达一个观点，突出自己在某一部分的长处，然后把这句话放在段首，方便别人阅读。开头可以加一句要申请某某学校某某项目，结尾就像你自己回复的，写上future plan和why me & why school，最后这一部分可以占个接近1/3，因为这个才是别人比较在意的部分吧，不然他们不如看CV。

不知道可以写什么的话，可以去要申请的学校的网站上看看，比如这个项目的课程有没有感兴趣的，学校的professor有没有提供一些跟你合适的project，学校提供的职业指导，tech讲座等等，甚至学校地理位置什么的都可以拿来写。最后写写自己未来打算做一个xxx developer，学校的项目可以帮助我实现这个目标，就可以了。

When I began my career as a xxx undergraduate, I had very little idea of where I was heading. I decided to join Electrical Engineering department due to my natural inclination to mathematics and interest in computer programming. In the summer after my freshman year, the IT manager of National Instrument Shanghai offered me internship in his team. Seeing it as an opportunity to learn from other well-experienced engineers, I jumped on the position with duties of technical assistance for network and hardware issues. From my colleagues, I first heard about machine learning.
With the curiosity to data manipulation developed from the summer, I played with web crawlers and enjoyed an image-compressing course assignment. In the next semester, I joined in Prof xxx’s EMC signal integrity team, where I was first shown design of power amplifiers, practiced lab techniques of conductive and radiative tests for EMC, and learned to test and analyze EMC on real-life products, such as desktop PC, and tablets. I have since tried to enroll in classes that I thought would prepare me for future in graduate school by working with signal processing and machine learning. Having completed courses like Digital Signal Processing Application and project of rhythm game on microprocessor, I believe that my solid background leaves me prepared to make contributions to your graduate program.
Through the research work with Prof xxx at xxx, I have gained valuable research experience in cluster analysis of machine learning. I spent the summer after my sophomore year, under the supervision of Prof xxx, parallelizing EM algorithm for big data clustering with unknown number of clusters. We first split the input dataset into small tasks by dimensions, approximated each task by Variational Bayes EM with penalized likelihood and initialization patterns, and then combined the tasks by re-approximate clusters near the “boundaries”. By comparing with Infinite GMM in cases of 10k data points, our method proved to be about 20 times faster with an acceptable loss of accuracy. Recently, I continue the work with Prof xxx on developing recommender system for movie rating. We utilize Hadoop MapReduce and HDFS to build co-occurrence matrix and implement matrix operation on raw dataset contains 33 k movies and 240 k users. Clustering techniques and Collaborative Filtering would be applied to the recommender system by Mahout for our next step.
In my junior year, I worked as Quality Intern on smart electricity meters’ tests in Landis & Gyr. It is a chance for me not only to reinforce the skills from school, but also to gain some industrial exposure. Unlike the milieu of college, the corporate environment is quite different – the rate of learning, the responsibility of your position, the work flow of various solutions. The most valuable parts, however, are self-motivation and independent problem-solving skills that play a large part of my work there. In the fall, I worked with a test engineer on modifying functional tests of various meters. In the next summer, I utilized the knowledge from previous term and contributed to build a SQL database for test data. I independently developed a short-term tool by VB, a language I never used before. Then I taught myself T-SQL and collaborated with IT group to develop a long-term tool on SQL server. As a contributor from Quality group, I took the responsibility of both data flow’s stability and development of statistical analysis features, such as P value’s estimation in the database.
Moving toward graduate school, I am interested in continuing my study on signal processing. After completing my graduate program, I'd like to work as a Research & Development engineer. I'm sure that formally studying at xxx would channelize my capabilities and leave me well prepared for any postgraduate endeavors. My research and work experience has equipped me with unique abilities and skills to offer xxx’s EE graduate program.

补充内容 (2016-10-30 13:27):
才发现附件要大米。。。

最后一段太简略了

补充内容 (2016-10-30 19:43):
把前面再精简一下，最后一段充实一下

lw_nju 发表于 2016-10-30 19:43
最后一段太简略了

补充内容 (2016-10-30 19:43):

谢谢，最后一段想介绍一下自己的future plan和why me & why school。但是有的无从下手的感觉，包括最后两句衔接感觉也不是很顺，不知道能不能帮忙提示下可以拓展的点？另外前面的精简是指开头引导兴趣部分，还是后面的research和工作经历？

LumiG 发表于 2016-11-1 01:55
有点像CV的扩充版，而且都在讲故事。个人意见，每段尽量表达一个观点，突出自己在某一部分的长处，然后把这 ...

你的意见很中肯！我发现自己的PS基本上全是叙述自己的经历，应该改一下结构给三分之一的篇幅来回答学校提的问题，而且经历和purpose都应该有主题句或者小标题。看来需要大改一下啦！