ps初稿求狠批

When I was in high school, if I felt puzzled about something such as a math problem, I would force myself to spend tremendous time on it until I could understand it fully. I really liked having the feeling of a comprehensive understanding. Through the process of struggling to comprehend all the related conceptions of a hard problem, I made great progress in Math. For this reason, I had laid a hard foundation for my future study in computer science in high school.

During my first class of Advanced Language Programming, the professor introduced basic conceptions of C and told us what we could do by using it. At that time, I was inspired by his introduction and eager to make some experiments instantly. Then, I installed my first compiler of C and made tremendous tries following the book in a short time. I was fascinated with programming and developed programming skills greatly. After that, I took part in the ACM Training Group of our university. I almost spent all my leisure time in the laboratory learning useful date structures, amazing algorithms, debugging skills and programming skills. During this process, I had overcome many difficulties, such as how to write an abstract recursion function, how to construct dynamic planning and so on. This experience greatly enhanced my understanding of what I had learned in courses. Additionally, it also equipped me with the ability to implement ideas with programming quickly.

After I graduated from school, I was admitted by Bytedance as a software engineer, responsible for sever development and optimization. It was really different to write code at work, as you need to consider more things and in most cases, you don't need to use complex algorithms or data structures that you had learned in college. My first service redesign project was a big challenge for me because I had no prior experience in service design. So I searched related information in google and learned design criterions of server service. Following these instructions, I finally developed the new service well. Also, to implement high traffic service, I learned to reduce pressure with the Asynchronous Processing Mechanism by using a Message Queue. The more projects I took part in, the more familiar with different kinds of storage. So I learned which kind of storage we should use in a given situation.
As I encountered many challenges in projects, I realized the importance of keeping learning the latest knowledge and practical tools. In some important services, I needed to be very careful and made sure there would be no accident. Service stability also came first. To guarantee this, I would write a unit test for every important function and monitor the key index of services. Gradually, I formed a good habit of managing my work and held a rigorous thought of code change. Sometimes, I was tasked to optimize some services and in most cases, I could make a big plan to improve the service in many aspects. However, it was not always like that. As I have worked for several years, I have to face a fact that with basic knowledge of computer science, it is not enough for me to handle some really difficult situations and google can't help me solve every problem. Holding this idea, I think I should make some changes.

Information from Google is always diverse and scattered. But university courses are concentrated and effective. By spending one or two years studying in college, I hope that I can gain systematic knowledge of computer science and have a better understanding of infrastructures. It is beneficial for my future career. In the future, with a better understanding of computer science, I hope to acquire a software engineer position in big companies like Google or Microsoft, focusing on backend service and developing impactful software for people worldwide.

One of the great reasons why I determine to further my study at The University of Texas at Austin is its friendly curriculum. I am especially interested in the course Computer Network because it can improve my understanding of Network which is often very confusing for me. Additionally, being able to have an internship in summer offers me more opportunities to gain a good job in the future. It is also very convenient to have onsite interviews in Texas. Considering my major, CS, and my experience as a software engineer, I am confident that CS is the most suitable program for me. It is my heartfelt desire that I may continue studying in this program and become an outstanding software engineer after graduation.

大概看了一下，有几点意见：

1. 感觉整篇PS陈述目的居多：解释为什么对编程感兴趣，解释编程中学到了什么，介绍了工作中学到了什么，介绍了工作中觉得学习知识不系统产生继续留学的motivation，解释了为什么想去这个学校。但在这些描述中缺少了一些直接或间接对自己能力，优点，成绩，个性品格等其他反映Personal的特点的叙述。总的来说这篇PS比较实诚，但感觉缺乏一点点亮点。

2.  一些语法小问题。“and in most cases”前面缺少逗号；So太口语化了；etc. 可以在最终定稿后找native speaker润色润色。

求加米！

1. 比较赞同楼上的观点，没有突出个人的能力和特质，并且在叙述中也没有集中体现自己克服困难的过程，search on google是不够，要体现你如何把一个难题拆细，比如通过某个网站、从某个案例中得到启发、发现某个算法可以改进，要体现解决问题有条理、有逻辑。
2. 开头过于平淡，对数学的兴趣如何过渡到编程上，需要elaborate一下，并且尽量具体。第一句话可以找一个特别吸引你+你有很多尝试和思考的数学问题作引入，比较具体。
3. 语言chinglish的部分比较多

求加米~~~

一点拙见
1. 第一段到第二段的过渡有点不自然，高中数学好其实和编程能力中间间隔太多东西。这个例子也不够attractive，有点千篇一律，建议想一想当时为什么选择计算机，回顾一下自己的过去会对写PS有很大帮助
2. body部分的例子连接得不太顺畅，我觉得写PS是一个故事而不是单纯地拓展CV的内容。有种，你经历过的关于CS的故事讲给别人听，读完让别人觉得“这个人确实喜欢计算机，确实有talent”这种感觉。这个很难，我当时改了二十几稿才把经历串连贯了。
3. 我觉得why school这部分，有点敷衍。这部分蛮重要的，建议到官网好好查一下项目信息，或者问一些认识的人，在地理搜一下就读体验，然后把你的target和这个学校的特质结合起来，否则这部分就没啥用处了。
4. 语言找native speaker多改几稿会好很多。
加油！

感觉楼主的ps写的不够走心，让人感觉不出为什么这个项目能帮到你。各个段落之间的经历衔接不太强，感觉就是人生的这一段时间干了这个事，另一段干了那个事，最后要去读个master，，，