职场从survive到thrive 【讨论】

学会隐忍 不要只抱着老板这个大腿 老板的peer以后也有可能成为你的老板 老板倒掉也要做好接老板班的准备

很棒的总结 真的太厉害了

找到正确的队友。如果是个坑，就早点跳走。一个人技术再牛逼也无法成功，需要交到合适的朋友（这个人可以是你的老板，也可以是其他的组的人），和合适的朋友发展战略友谊，在一个合适的时机，齐力把你们的项目推出去。

遇到一个好老板很重要, 当老板的门槛并不高, 很多人也是一边带人一边学习如何做个好老板. 有时候真的没必要和老板一起踩坑

K姐真是鹈鹕灌顶

真是时光荏苒 ， 这个帖子居然是这么久之前的了！
感觉自己过去几年在soft skills上面成熟了不少，坑也没少踩。
对自己未来的想法也清楚了很多 － 人的偏好和习惯都不是一成不变的。
距离发这个帖子到现在，实现了两个挺大的pivot

人需要一直不断的前进，并且问自己 － 这还是我希望前行的方向吗？
when things fit right - it’s really a pleasant experience
I don’t care about wlb (I do slightly more than 996, voluntarily, simply because I love it)
I don’t care about comp (and my comp is OK, reasonable but not outrageous)
I don’t care about levels (still want to advance but it’s not as important as working on things that I love with a team that I enjoy spending time with)
I don’t care about branding (happy with the current brand, still as proud of it as the last time around…)

and I have learned to appreciate what’s most important, and brush aside the tiny little imperfections -  what job is perfect anyway?
看过金玉其外败絮其中的公司之后，才真心学会了珍惜。

有很多感悟，以后慢慢写。

老板不给力怎么办？
－ 首先需要灵魂挖掘一下：到底是他的错，还是自己的错. most of the time, both sides share some responsibility, but chances are you will get the short end of the stick when you clash with your manager.
除了换组走人还有其他办法吗？

有。（以下所说可能更适用高级别的IC或者manager，不过junior看看也可以）

仔细考虑你需要老板帮你做什么？资源？在他的peer那边挺你？信息？建议？
如果这个老板不肯或者无能力提供，那么你如何用其他途径得到你所需要的？

关键是，一定要focus在解决你自己的问题，满足的需求上。千万不要带情绪。

对不好的老板，要采取笑里藏刀政策。对，要虚伪。永远不要硬怼。别说什么白人烙印才虚伪 － 笑里藏刀这种成语咱古人就有的。就看你愿意不愿意用了。在老板面前仍然要表现成态度好，愿意干活的好员工。让他可以害你的时候懒得去害你。帮你就不用想了。

那么如何解决自己需求？
找其他途径。

Need feedback?可能你老板的peer可以给你feedback。maybe your own peers. Maybe even your direct reports (if you are a manager). Skip level could also work but less so.

Need resources? skip level is the best shot. Craft a good message, present a thorough case. 这样无论能否成功，起码给人印象是你做事很thorough. 而且这种事情要学习”rejection proof”- 别怕，有理有据的多去试试提要求。it’s a numbers game - 要学习salesman的心态，别指望能get every request — you win some you lose some, but if you persist, and keep asking, you will get a lot, eventually.  成功的就开开心心收下，失败的要brush aside，调整状态重新再来。

Need info? go sideways - 看看其他function的人那边有没有你需要的信息？很可能eng那边躲躲藏藏半天，pm随便就给你了。或者试试去peer的手下，因为对方比你级别低，对你提的要求一般会踊跃满足。你需要记住这些人，适时帮他们一把就打平了。别忘记别人手下的力量 －－ they can feed you critical info, gossip, refer people to you, share feedback that you don’t get from their boss, etc. And these people have a strong incentive of playing nice with you.

Need support? other than working with peers / your boss’s peers directly, consider going to skip level. 这种时候大老板一句话就完事了。你自己慢慢磨估计一个quarter都搞不定。

这里就提到skip很多次，那么要不要跟skip说你老板不好？
我个人是建议不要轻易说。
How do you know your skip is not in the same line with your boss - maybe they are friends.
Maybe your skip hired your boss and likes him a lot.  — this you need to validate via other channels before making any move.
Maybe your skip is as bad as your boss.

Even if your skip doesn’t like your boss, should you complain to your skip about your boss?
Still, most likely, no.
He may already know about the case and has been tired of hearing complaints - but is too busy or too XYZ to handle the situation. From your perspective, this bad boss is very high pri - but your skip may have 1001 things on his plate, and this one mediocre middle manager may be less than ideal but far from a fire that he needs to fight right now.  
If your boss is really bad, he may have heard about this from many others already, such as your peers.
If he decides not to take action right away —— you need to find out why.

But how should you let him know your boss is bad?
By going to your skip to get what you want - you are already sending the signal to him that you are not having all your needs required to do your job. If your skip is reasonable, he will get the idea pretty quickly.

This way you don’t complain about anything, still convey your dissatisfaction but in a very subtle way. In case this leaks to your boss, you can still honestly say - I never said anything. －－－ and while you do this, you need to be extra respectful and kind to your boss — yes to make him feel safe.

And you’d solve your immediate problem.

Should you ever go to your skip’s boss? probably not… you’d be too insignificant in that person’s eyes…
if an org is too corrupted, then consider the following:
=========================
what if you have tried all these, kept a positive attitude, and things are still not going well?
then you should consider leaving.

if you believe you have tried everything within your power to make yourself successful at the current role, but things don’t improve, you should move on.

Should you then complain?
still depends. and you need to do it safely

The valley is a small place.
you can say things in your exit interview, if there’s one.
If this is an internal transfer, don’t bother….

What i say here may seem cowardly —- i am not optimizing for courage - I am instead optimizing for getting what I need via whatever means possible, within moral range.

======================
But honestly, bad bosses do exist. But a lot of the times, both sides have some part in a less than great relationship. Consider that carefully.

It’s fairly easy to work well under a great boss.

The ability to work well under a bad boss truly sets you apart from your peers - and trust me, your skip level (if he’s good) would take notice.