PS PS 大家给点意见哦？

Environment protection can’t be solved by a slogan but requires the full resources of science halt and hopefully correct many of the damages that humans have inflicted on the earth. The limitation of promoting through slogans was realized through my attempts at raising the awareness of students during my undergraduate studies at HuaZhong University.
    I joined the Environmental Institute and remember running up and down hallways trying to persuade students to participate in the 60 “Earth Hour” project. I also visited local elementary schools to teach children about protecting the environment. At this time I thought it a great honor to inform people about something as important as our environment and was convinced I could change people’s ideas and habits regarding the environment.
     During a course in “Environment Economics” we were introduced to pollution dispute case—a chemical factory had severely damaged the livelihood of a village—that remained unsolved since 1997. The factory spill-off had destroyed area forests, contaminated the rice paddies, and polluted the local streams, killing fish, shrimp and shellfish. Instances of sickness and disease increased among the villagers, all attributed to the dumping practises of the chemical plant. What shocked me most about the case were the numerous environmental safety banners evident throughout the factory advising workers of environmental safety and protection. These were neglected in favor of the economic gains promoted by the management. I concluded mere talk effects little without a comprehensive environmental management system and the technologies that support it. I claimed a greater commitment to the study of environmental engineering as a result of this case study, and have since been engaged in research in the latest technologies and how to effectively implement them in waste treatment and pollution remediation practises. I have also improved my GPA and passed the required English examinations in order apply for overseas study so as to gain a better understanding of western technologies and practises and to learn how these might be implemented inside China.
     I very quickly became involved in research as a result and joined the lab of Professor ZhangYanrong. I began as a research assistant, preparing samples and handling the practical details of her experiments. We were researching Tio2 as a potential photocatalyst and I began spending considerable free time in the library studying experiment design and reading the findings of other researchers. I soon began independent research into the degradation of MC-LR using electro- & photo-Fenton processes. A challenge was combining different methods in purification and I spent considerable extracting MC-LR due to its low purity and instability. I learned much about the degradation mechanism as a result of these repeated experiments, but more importantly I realized through many setbacks that I could handle research and work progressively toward results. My supervisor Prof Zhang once advised me, “the most terrible in doing research is having no problems,” and I now feel very comfortable in the lab despite its many frustrations.   
My senior practicum was at two local wastewater treatment plants, where I learned that industry practises are quite different from the lab research. Methods useful in the lab are rarely implemented in the industry until substantial investigation confirms their effectiveness. This was a hard fact to accept but it further motivated me to pursue studies abroad in order to understand best industry practices in America and how I might implement them during my career here in China.
      I was thrilled to discover the environmental engineering program at Northeastern because it offered both the prospect of continuing my research and the opportunity to observe industry practices in the field. I am especially excited by the possibility of observing the work of professors Larese-Casanova, Hellweger, and Alshawabkeh in electro-chemical process and phytocatalysis work. I believe my current work alongside Prof Zhang at XMU has well prepared me for continued studies at Northeastern and you can be confident that I will offer my best endeavors to support and advance the research conducted in the department. My hope is that the skills, findings and observations I gain at Northeastern will guide me in my future career addressing the environmental concerns I have about China, especially the soil pollution around the Yangtze River Delta and the serious water contamination in my hometown-Hubei province, once called “QianHuZhiSheng”).  Through the study and research of your department, I hope I could be a qualified engineer in environmental engineering and have the ability to solve the concerning problems in my country and the whole world.

有木有人帮看看啊

为什么我第一句就没看到懂。。可能英语太弱了。。。

中规中矩，无亮点，无明显缺点，如果你硬件不错，PS 不会拖后腿，同样，如果硬件一般，PS 也不会加多少分

回复 4# zolasaki

借楼主帖子真心求教，有亮点的ps应该是什么样的？至今看过的ps还没有觉得一见难忘的，除了经历是N篇paper的以外……

有没有什么建议啊，哪里需要修改的地方

建议就是没突出自己的能力。通篇看下来除了实验室那几次试验就没了。
你为什么不写你看到那个factory case后有什么行动？
在我看来，PS 最重要两点：对这个东西的激情，和做这个东西的能力。像环保方面我觉得更能写出自己的commitment。

不用把一些琐碎的东东写出来吧 感觉木有什么印象看过 很平淡的列了下自己经历 不痛不痒 还要挖掘亮点 我觉得1、2个就可以了  鄙人的愚见    LZ自己再琢磨下吧 加油哦

谢谢大家的意见啊

lz是申phd还是ms？