申请工程管理ms的ps稿子，前几天发过，现在做了一些修改，继续求猛拍

The first time when I noticed engineering management could be traced back to my second year of college. At that time, I had been the manager of our student union for two years and often made plan for some activities and supervised their execution. Gradually I found my majoy---electric engineering was not the appropriate one for my future. There are several reasons facilitating my decision of choosing engineering management instead of electric engineering as my future major. Above all, though I could get down to the research and stay in lab for a whole day, I am very extraverted with a stronger desire and prominent ability to communicate with others. In addition, as demonstrated in my resume, I had participated in management of many activities and project with the keenest enthusiasm because through arranging every person to finish the whole work appropriately in order to maximize the efficiency of the system, I could realize my individual value as well as create social value. Based on these facts,  I found that some graduate programs of engineering management were the best choice for me.
In my first two years of college, because of my preference of several courses, I did not get a high gpa. In the third year, I realized that one should be versatile no matter what he wants to be. Thus, in the third year of my college, I came to the classroom first and left the last everyday. With a whole year’s assiduous work, my gpa had been promoted by o.6 in a single year. At the same time, I was not satisfied with my situation and kept training my ability of practicing. Based on Sunplus-51 microcomputer, I cooperated with several classmates and made a voice-activated telecar which could be controlled by the voice of user. In addition, after completing the study of Sunplus-61 microcomputer, we made an automatic fireproof alarm that could point to the source of ignition based on the motor driven circuit and DS18B20 temperature transducer. We gain knowledge as well as friendship during the process. Besides, I organized a team to compete in China Undergraduate Mathematical Contest in Modeling and responsible for writing code for the model and test its execution as the team leader. I adopted Cluster Analysis to simplify the data scale and employ Principal Component Analysis to build a regression equation. In the end, the method Canonical Correlation Analysis was used to analyze the data and we draw a scientific conclusion. With our great efforts we gain the First Prize of Shandong.
While upgrading my academic skills, I hunted for many kinds of internships in the internet. In Jul 2012, an offer from Shenzhen INVT electric Ltd. Company came to me. In this company, I worked as the assistant of the manager of R&D department, my routine work was helping my manager to finish the schedule of our department and dealing with organization of the conferences held by him. During the work of organization, my ability of dealing with emergency was strengthened. The arrangement of conference room has met a problem once, the marketing department and our department was to use the same room at the same time. I immediately negotiated with the room manager and issued the smoothly running of the conference. In addition, by watching and imitating the method of dealing the relationship with others applied by my manager, the definition of management became more clear and concrete in my mind. In the intermittence of my internship, I joined the international young leader summit held by the Chinese University of Hong Kong and financial management internship program held by Mass Mutual Asia Ltd – Kingdom Region as the team leader. During the summit and program, I cooperate with the organizing committee to manage the arrangement of team member and the schedule of class. At the same time, I learned some basic knowledge such financial management and operation management in class.
It is a pivotal step of realizing my dream to be admitted into the graduate program of engineering management in xx university, xx university was my first choice for several reasons. Firstly, the engineering management program in xx university has a strong overall reputation and can offer precious courses in this field. Without doubt engineering management will be the trend in the future as a new-born interdisciplinary subject. As a young person of 23 years old, I possess the compassion and energy that match the age; and it is definite that I would communicate with kindred spirits in the school. Additionally, xx university has an excellent location, it locates in the area as well as many famous international enterprise. They have the most advanced idea of management and could offer more internship opportunities for international students.
In the future, I will spare no efforts on my study and professional career. I love this major and had got a general understanding of it. To be an expert in this field, I must absorb as much more as I can to build a complete and sound system of knowledge which will be the most solid foundation of mine to feet in the society and create more social value.


希望各位大大多提意见，不吝赐教！

我刚接触PS这些，所以不好点评。
不过我个人感觉这PS太长了... 而且有的地方说太具体了。
适当缩减一下会更好。

不过总的来说还是挺好的啦..

第二排吗，major不是majoy，spelling mistake