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[T作文-求改] TPO 48独立写作加米求狠批!六月大考在即, 求地里大神指点迷津!

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[T作文-求改] TPO 48独立写作加米求狠批!六月大考在即, 求地里大神指点迷津!

TPO 48:

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?

Because modern life is very complex, it is essential for young people to have the ability to plan and organize.

Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

作文:
Thanks to technological improvements, the world is developing very fast these days. Thus, the requirements for the workers have also been advanced. Apart from the adults, many people have been discussing improving teenagers' abilities. Among all, planning and organizing is the one that has been covered the most. From my perspective, I think it is very important for young people to have the ability of planning and organizing.
Firstly, planning and organizing can help students to increase their efficiency in finishing tasks. Nowadays, the study burden is much heavier compared to that 10 years ago. To be more specific, students are required to not only learn the courses at school but also join in activities outside school. In this way, planning and organizing their tasks can help them to manage their time effectively. Take my cousin Emily as an example, she is now a fourth-grader. However, she only has half a day to rest on the weekends because she took violin classes, dancing classes, etc. Her life gets a lot easier after she managed her time with a chart. After organizing her work, she not only has more leisure time but also learns much happier.
Second of all, students can pursue better jobs in the future if they could manage their daily tasks orderly. Apart from having a good grades at school, companies also required their workers to organize their work well. My friend Brittany is a great example to illustrate this. She is a graduate of Northwestern University. She has been applying for a job at Google. In the interview, she and other applicants were asked to do finished a quite challenging task in half a day. At first, she thought it was impossible to finish the task. Luckily, she had been very good at planning and organizing since a very young age. Thanks to her skill, she finished the work just on time and did it quite well. In the end, she got a job at Google.
All in all, young people need to develop the ability to plan and organize as they could benefit a lot from it. Adolescence will not only finish the task efficiently and effectively but also have a great job in the future.


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1.join in activities我认为不对,in去掉
2.body-1论证不连贯,分论点是decrease efficiency,但是你最后一句却是have more leisure time and study more happier. 这两个其实并不等同,而且你的段内对比论证:前面应细节描述效率低下,转折因为plan这个技能又是如何提高学习效率的!
以上纯属个人观点!
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 楼主| 微信用户_4d4049c 2022-5-21 03:16:15 | 显示全部楼层
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嗯,万分感谢,已做修改
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